For my final Constructing America project (a history and english hybrid class at my school which is focused on America’s history), we were tasked to reflect on a topic, theme, or issue related to the entire course that I’ve come to care about or see differently. We had to revisit past readings, particularly focusing on what has stayed with you and how it shapes your views as you look to the future. The project has to be both personal and analytical, incorporating at least four quotations from Angels in America and one other non-textbook source. In my project, I decided to create an acrylic painting titled “The Weight of Conformity” that explores the tension between Ralph Waldo Emerson’s concept of self-reliance and the powerful influence of societal norms on individual identity.
I depicted a figure holding a large overwhelming rock to symbolize the burden of carrying societal expectations. I applied details to the figure’s arms, showing strained muscles, and placed him in a contorted posture to emphasize how exhausting and oppressive these forces can be. To convey the universality of this struggle, I portrayed the figure in a shadow-like form, representing the idea that anyone can be subjected to social labeling. I contrasted these stark, muted colors of the figure with bright, almost billboard-like lettering of the labels. This contrast highlights the disparity between the individual’s internal struggles and the loud, unavoidable imposition of categories. The bright, attention-grabbing labels overshadow the figure’s subdued form, much like how societal labels often overshadow one’s true self. I then muted the background without any significant details, reflecting the isolation often dealt with when grappling with conformity— societal pressures feel all-encompassing, while the individual’s true environment fades into the background.
Waldo Emerson’s concept of individuality and self-reliance. Emerson’s ideal of self-reliance is about rejecting societal norms and being true to oneself, as each person has a unique voice and perspective that external pressures should not compromise. However, this perspective may be overly simplistic, failing to fully acknowledge the pervasive and often insidious influence of societal expectations on individual identity. Emerson insists that if you “speak your latent conviction, it shall be the universal sense; for the inmost in due time becomes the outmost” (Emerson,165). In reality, expressing genuine beliefs often invites societal critique for non-conformity rather than immediate resonance.
The painting in acrylic captures this reality by depicting a central figure burdened by a massive weight, symbolizing societal norms and expectations. Labels like “homosexual,” “dyslexic,” and “black” are displayed on a heavy rock, representing the societal categories imposed on individuals. The figure’s strained posture and grim expression vividly convey the struggle to preserve individuality under societal labels’ oppressive weight. The hunched posture and strained muscles underscore the physical and emotional toll of carrying these burdens, depicting a constant struggle against external definitions of identity. This visual representation demonstrates how Emerson’s ideals of self-reliance are often unattainable for most individuals. Tony Kushner’s character Roy Cohn in Angels in America exemplifies someone who hides his authentic self to maintain his social and professional status. Despite engaging in homosexual relationships, he denies being gay, insisting, “Roy Cohn is a heterosexual man… who fucks around with guys” (46). He clings to the heterosexual label to preserve his power and influence within society.
Kushner’s specific language through Roy’s dialogue exposes the depth of his internal conflict and societal pressures. Roy states, “Like all labels they tell you one thing and one thing only: where does an individual so identified fit in the food chain, in the pecking order? Not ideology, or sexual taste, but something much simpler: clout” (46). This speech reveals Roy’s belief that identity is secondary to power and influence, demonstrating how societal norms about power dynamics overshadow personal truths. For Roy, “homosexual” connotes powerlessness and social failure rather than a mere sexual orientation. Even when dying, Roy denies his authentic self, insisting to his doctor, Henry, “Homosexuals have AIDS. I have liver cancer” (47). This denial prevents adequate treatment and plays a crucial role in his tragic end. Thus, the weight of societal labels ultimately crushes Roy.
Analyzing Roy’s character made me reflect on how I, too, feel the weight of labels. For a long time, I could not admit to myself that I had dyslexia; I felt that the label carried with it implications about my intelligence and capabilities. This societal perception held me back, much like Roy’s denial of his sexuality constrained him. When it was my turn to read aloud in class, I immediately felt anxious, anticipating which lines would be mine so I could rehearse. In reality, I am very capable of reading aloud, yet, the label “dyslexic” clung to me, distorting my self-perception and making me doubt my abilities. Recognizing the weight that labels carry has enabled me to separate my true self from the identity constructed by society. In the painting, I deliberately depicted the figure as a shadow, symbolizing that anyone can feel the weight of societal labels. The labels the figure carries vary, including “homosexual” (Roy Cohn) and “dyslexic” (myself). This choice emphasizes the universal nature of these burdens, showing a common struggle of reconciling self-reliance and societal conformity.
